No Expectations… No dissapointments 

  

Often, the things we expect lead to dissapointment when they happen unexpectedly. The quote above is kind of a mantra that I have developed somewhat… ‘No expectations, no disappointments.’ This quote can honestly be applied to absolutely anything (and it works!). 

It’s not something that is encouraged but at times, expecting the lowest outcome can produce the most pleasant results when something that happens is above your expectations. I tend to apply this mantra the most with personal relationships. 

I’ve stopped expecting so highly when it comes to people because they will let you down (sometimes at your most neediest). What is to be remembered is that you really have no say on how one conducts themselves, you can influence but if it’s not from their heart, is it really a behaviour that one can adopt? I’ve learned on my journey that the less you expect from someone, the more you will enjoy that relationship. 

For example, if you’re always expecting a phone call or text from somebody, you will be disappointed when that phone call or text does not happen. The next time that you call them, could end up in a bust up or even a little resentment.

So what do you do? 

Don’t expect anyone to do anything for you.

That’s it! 

This mantra is epic because it works! It really does. I’m genuinely surprised when people do certain acts for me and I’m grateful for them when they occur.
Try it today!! 
Xx

“He’s not perfect…

“He’s not perfect. You aren’t either, and the two of you will never be perfect. But if he can make you laugh at least once, causes you to think twice, and if he admits to being human and making mistakes, hold onto him and give him the most you can. He isn’t going to quote poetry, he’s not thinking about you every moment, but he will give you a part of him that he knows you could break. Don’t hurt him, don’t change him, and don’t expect for more than he can give. Don’t analyze. Smile when he makes you happy, yell when he makes you mad, and miss him when he’s not there. Love hard when there is love to be had. Because perfect guys don’t exist, but there’s always one guy that is perfect for you.” – Bob Marley

Kisses – Embracing the Sense of Touch

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What happens when you kiss? Sometimes it’s magical, at times it’s beautiful but at times it can be meaningless without the passion behind it.

It may seem weird, two people touching lips together. Who thought of that in the first place? But the intimacy experienced with kissing is one of the closest ways of connecting with another person. Never take for granted a kiss – it can bring up so many emotions and feelings that one never knew that they had. It’s such a beautiful thing that we have been given. Whoever thought of the idea to touch lips is a genius because it is universal experience that we all share.

Parable of the Four-Poster

Because she wants to touch him,
she moves away.
Because she wants to talk to him,
she keeps silent.
Because she wants to kiss him,
she turns away
& kisses a man she does not want to kiss.

He watches
thinking she does not want him.
He listens
hearing her silence.
He turns away
thinking her distant
& kisses a girl he does not want to kiss.

They marry each other–
a four-way mistake.
He goes to bed with his wife
thinking of her.
She goes to bed with her husband
thinking of him.
–& all this in a real old-fashioned four-poster bed.

Do they live unhappily ever after?
Of course.
Do they undo their mistakes ever?
Never.
Who is the victim here?
Love is the victim.
Who is the villain?
Love that never dies.

© Erica Mann Jong

He’s just not that into you

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If he doesn’t call you back… He’s just not that into you

A while ago I read a book called ‘He’s just not that into you’ – it made me realise many home truths about relationships and why they cause many issues. Here are several issues that many girls may have gone through with guys:

1. He doesn’t respond to your text messages

I have seen this happen many times and I find it funny but it gets others really frustrated. Typical situation where you send a text message to a guy and he does not respond but he updates his Facebook status, whatsapp, Twitter – whatever it may be. There is a clear reason why he is not responding to your message ‘he’s just not that into you’. It could be other reasons but if this is happening in a regular occasion, it is likely this is the case. Don’t fret, there are plenty more fishes in the sea as they say. If you are the type that requires immediate attention, this may not be the best mode if communication. Try setting up face to face meetings rather than relying on text messages. You may be able to establish a connection that way.

2. He doesn’t show that much interests in your interests

If you find yourself talking about something that you are greatly passionate about something only to find that he is not listening – he really isn’t making an effort with you and equally meaning that he is not that into you.

It’s understandable that not everyone you meet will not be interested in what you are interested in but it is courtesy to show an interest in someone’s passion. If this is not the case, just forget about any blossoming romance.

3. He only calls you when he wants something

I don’t even have to go there. If he calls you when he wants something, he is using you! He only wants you for his own selfish reasons. Get away fast! You will get hurt eventually when he finds a new toy.

4. He doesn’t show you any intention of committing to you

You’ve been ‘friends’ for a while but you’re no more than that. He shows no interest in making you exclusive – he’s just not that into you. Simple!

5. He friend zones you on a regular basis

Always saying that you’re his friend… Uh oh – not good if you’re looking for more than that.

In conclusion, you shouldn’t waste your time chasing after a guy if they are clearly not into you. It will all just end in heartbreak.

I did not keep your letters by Gabrielle Radley

I read them,
and then I threw them in the trash,
but make no mistake, I read them.

I swallowed them whole.
I filled my eyes with every word,
I sewed them in patterns
into my flesh of my body,
at night I wake to entertain the ghosts
lounging in my bedroom
with impromptu recitations
of your letters, of your thoughts,
of the shape of you in words

but I could not keep your letters.

I could not let them languish
in a dusty box, fermenting
into poisons in the closet dark.
I could not let them lie in wait,
like coiled paper vipers
ready to strike the hand that strays
too far and stirs the den.